If I could go back and talk to my younger self, I would say

“Find some male friends to share your life with!” Find some friends who listen without fixing or spouting religious or other platitudes. If you can’t find them in the church, go to the pub. If none are in the pub, join a club or hobby group. Don’t give up, perservere! If you can’t find them, make them. When you share your heart, if someone tries to fix you, tell them “Stop, what I need right now is someone who will listen without trying to fix me”. Give them a chance to grow into this role. If after a while they cannot, then move on. But do NOT retreat into solitude and loneliness. Kindred spirits are out there, but it takes courage to find them. You’ll need to lay out some fragile treasures from your soul and risk having them trampled on. When Jesus said “Don’t cast your pearls before swine” I wish he had added “more than once” because pigs only reveal themselves when they trample your or someone elses treasure. Beware of the pigs, but don’t let the existance of pigs deter you. You need one or two friends to whom you can share anything, friends who won’t castigate you or give advice, rather who will say “Wow! That’s bad! let’s get a drink!” and who will laugh with you at our shared human stupidity.

Find some friends you can trust with your treasures. Don’t give up! Keep reaching out until you find some fast friends. And the best way to find them is for you to be such a friend to them. We are surrounded by people who long for the same thing: open, honest, accepting, loving friendship.